Guess How I Spent Sunday (TMI?)

Let just say lots of quality bathroom time. And I blame K. Who can refuse the affections of a two and a half year old full of hugs and kisses, even if she is harboring gastroenteritis (stomach bug) germs? Of course, I really should have known better, what with answering tons of questions at work the day before about kids having vomiting and diarrhea. Thank goodness for the first word of "24-hour stomach bug". Downside - better enough to go to work today. :(

I now have tender feelings toward my downstairs neighbor. They recently moved in, we hadn't met the couple yet, and the wife brought by some croissant rolls last night when she dropped off some of our mail that had been mixed up with theirs. It was the only solid food that appealed to me all day. Hooray for kind deeds.

Is That A Rhetorical Question?

I think it's rather silly that the pharmacy cashier asked how I was doing as she rang up my purchase of NyQuil, DayQuil, Benedryl, and Immodium. Yes, it's just something people say to be polite but honestly. I prefer 'did you find everything you were looking for?' That's a good customer service greeting.

Aiko

I just took one of those Facebook quizzes and it said my Japanese name is Aiko, which means 'love child'. How appropriate. This made me laugh.

On A Diet?

I'm not on a diet, never am. However some things make me feel fat and want to be one of 'those people' who can go on diets. Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, South Beach, Atkins, etc. But this isn't about dieting. This is about fat situations. You've heard of fat clothes? Well, there are certain activities that make nearly everyone look chubby. Got my hair cut today and I don't think anyone can look slim with that vinyl black sheet tied around their neck. (if you think you don't look horrible like that please don't tell me, I like to think I'm not the only one) I forget the other examples of fat situation I thought of earlier. The unpleasant mirror reflection didn't wreck my day - had some M&M's anyway.

Taking A Break

After another week of exhaustion, I told Nathan that I'm staying home from church today for 'a day of rest'. If Monday through Friday are for working and Saturday has to be used for errands and social activities, then I think I should occasionally get one day where I don't have any demands on my time. (I don't have kids so I can choose to do that)

Awkwardness (possible TMI)

Today I was putting on a sticker name tag when I again was reminded that I don't like wearing them. No problems with people knowing my name. It's more that the most logical placement - and where most men wear these - is in the chest area over a breast. Not very discreet. This is also why I started to dislike the Pledge Of Allegiance when puberty came along. I realize this is a little...dumb? but it's one of my hangups. Sounds like I either need to get over it or go in for one of those reduction surgeries.

Live For Today

Is there something in your life that you wish you had never done; that you had done? There are a lot of things I wish hadn’t happened, or had happened differently. Looking back, I see that - given my knowledge, skills, and emotional state of mind at that time – many of those choices I had control over couldn’t have happened with a better outcome. I also did many things because I felt like I didn’t have other options. And some days I dwell on those regrets.

Recently, I started paying attention to the lyrics of Tim McGraw’s Live Like You Were Dying. (Note: I'm not a country music fan) What if you knew how long you had left? Adults know they have a limited amount of time, but I imagine we generally have an expectation that time will be at least sixty years, and hopefully end in a peaceful, natural death. But what if it was less than that – much less? Would you live true to your ideals? Would you define your success by your career, or something else? Would you draw away from people, or closer? Would you become stronger in your religion, or hate God?

Why not now - today? Be the person you want to be. Be kinder. Make that phone call today. Redefine the relationships that cause you pain. Be spontaneous (or not). Don’t fret about the little things. Put less of the discretionary money into savings and take that trip. Quit the job you dread going to. Sign up for the class you’ve been thinking about. No, don’t forget about your future needs (get life insurance, write a will, have long term savings), but do live life now. Why put it off until tomorrow?

Happy Pioneer Day

Enjoy your parades and fireworks Utah. 

PS

And what kind of patriotic state has parades televised when celebrating the anniversary of the state's, er, statehood and nothing on TV when commemorating the founding of our nation? As for me, I put my country before my state. But hey, to each their own. Just don't come crying to me when people question your loyalty. Of course, it doesn't hurt to have a paid day off work for the state holiday.

This Is My Life

I go on vacation and have two days of extremely miserable allergy symptoms which largely resolve only to be followed by two days of increasingly worse sinus pressure and ear pain. The plus side is working at a doctor's office with someone who is kind enough to call in an antibiotic so that I don't have to be sick for the rest of my stay (cross your fingers).  Have you ever tried flying with (probable) sinus and ear infection? Been there, done that. I'd rather suffer a twelve hour layover in Phoenix - where the weather is like standing in a furnace and I don't know anyone to visit and it's not a hub so there's slim chance of getting out sooner. (Notice I didn't say that I'd rather have mono, or be hit by a car, or have broken ribs, or have a broken tailbone, or have pneumonia, or be recovering from surgery. People, I now have perspective. These things are worse than sinus misery.) 

It Really Bugs Me When...

parents give their sons middle names and not their daughters. What's with that?? Yes, yes, when they get married they can take their maiden name as a middle name. O-kay, so we're hinging a young woman's identity (well, just name) on her future as a wife? Lame. Very lame. And if she never marries? Or is a revolutionary and decides to keep her own last name? Oh, and until then, all those forms that ask for a middle initial will be filled in with NMI. That's the abbreviation for No Middle Initial. Does that just make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside? Thought so.

I've decided that I don't travel well. Kind of like a neurotic dog or a bottle of soda. I always get anxious that I'm going to forget something, often over pack, and usually drive Nathan nuts in the process. Speaking of Nathan, I thought about it and this will be the first trip I've taken without him since we've been married. I guess I'll find out that he really can get by without me telling him how to do things. But mostly I was thinking about how I'll miss the buffer space on the plane ride. We have this arrangement where I get the window seat and he gets the middle seat (because his skinny butt is less likely to touch the butt of the aisle seat person). Did you ever notice that it feels like you have more space when you're sitting on a plane next to someone you know? A bit less invasive of your personal space.

What's worse than moving?

Only thing I hate more than moving is cleaning the old apartment. Nathan sent me home for a break, sweet man. He said that since I was cleaning without him for three and a half hours then he could do the same. Of course, that'll bring us to 8 PM and I'm hoping maybe he'll have it finished by then because I can't handle any more. I just really hate the idea of the less than stellar landlady having a good excuse to keep our money. She is such a ditz.

I'll have to post pics of the new place once there's more to see than boxes. I'm learning that any apartment has some small quirks but I already like it a lot better than the ghetto 4-plex that we moved from.

Of course, I'm especially tired of the whole moving deal because I'm starting to get stressed about my upcoming trip back east. Now I'm thinking that I don't have any flattering clothes to wear and I need a haircut and who's going to take care of the pets... stuff like that. And I don't think I have the time or energy between now and Friday to find cute summer clothes. Is there even such a thing when you're bigger than a size 8?

(can't figure out how to get this un-bolded)

Anyone know how to pick a lock? My filing cabinet got locked when I was moving it and we don't have a key for the thing. Grr.

Half A Glass

I really am a glass half empty sort a gal. I'm already annoyed with certain aspects of the new apartment (yes we moved, more about that adventure in another post when I have the internet again). For instance, the swamp cooler squeaks; the hardware in the bathroom is gold colored not the usual silver; the bathroom sink has odd dimensions so that when I wash my hands they have to touch the sink itself; the bathroom has zero storage (including no "medicine cabinet"); the shelf system in the bedroom closets is poorly organized; the balcony isn't covered by a roof.

I repeat to myself, "no ice cream truck playing continuously for up to an hour at a time," "no mariachi music that vibrates the walls," "no scruffy looking children peering into my kitchen window," and more.

Who says I can't spend my afternoon off listening to Pandora and eating chocolate chips?

How Was Your Weekend?

Whether you're at school, at work, or on Facebook, on Mondays you're likely to be asked (or asking) "How was your weekend?" This morning, when a coworker asked me that question, I said 'okay.' But then I started telling her about what I did and I realized that I had a pretty darn good time.

On Friday I babysat for my friend. Actually, I got to play with my favorite toddler (does that still apply when the child is less than 24 months but not wobbly at all?) while Nathan got baby duty. Don't get me wrong, O is perfectly cute but at 3 months he's not exactly mobile.

Saturday we did yard sale-ing (Nathan's choice), went to a farmer's market, saw Confessions of a Shopaholic at the dollar-fifty theater, and stopped by a bunch of stores looking for a new wall clock since Nathan keeps taking the batteries out of the one in our living room because he thinks it's too loud. Funny thing is, after shopping at Bed, Bath & Beyond, Ross, Shopko, and Kohls, we finally found a clock that we both liked at WalMart. Go figure.

Sunday was Mother's Day. This meant that in addition to sitting through 3 hours of church meetings, I had to go see Nathan's mother and grandmother. I'll be kind and just say that both visits were Boring. But I was just telling my coworker about the nice part of the day...how Nathan served me breakfast in bed...when the office door opened and hubby walked in with a vase full of red roses.

Yes Ruth, I had a good weekend. I spent time with N doing activities other than TV watching, got a nice new clock and a cute new table lamp for my bedside, and got flowers just because instead of as an apology.

The most exciting thing? As I was clearing space for the lamp, I lifted up a stuffed animal and saw my wedding ring. Which is really neat because I hadn't seen it since November-ish and was starting to think that it was gone-for-good instead of missing-somewhere-in-the-house.

So, How was your weekend?

On The Road To Recovery

I've been stiffer and sorer today than I was yesterday. My chest feels tight because of the gas they put in me (so that organs could be visualized easier). My throat is sore from the intubation (apparently standard procedure). And my abdomen hurts because that's where the doc was mucking about. I have two small incision marks - one at my belly button and the other about an inch over the pubic bone. They both have round bruises around them and the lower one seeps a little. The information sheet I was sent home with says a little bleeding can be normal for the first 48-72 hours.

I didn't get to talk to the doctor yesterday after the operation. Because of the anesthesia and pain meds I was on, he just spoke with Nathan. So the second hand news I got about my insides is that the doc didn't find endometriosis. When Nathan told me this in post-op I almost cried from frustration. Sure, endometriosis isn't a fun thing to have and there's not cure, but at least the surgery would have helped the pain. Since the doctor didn't see any endo tissues to excise then I imagine that after I recuperate I'll have the same pelvic discomfort as before. Yes, that really bites.

I'm Home Again

Okay. I had a longer note written and then I erased it by accident. So now I'm just going to say that I got home around 3:30 and am doing well. Probably going back to sleep after typing this. Pretty drowsy from the anesthesia and pain meds.

In Twelve Hours I'll be done :-)

I'm supposed to arrive at the surgery center at 7:30 AM and the operation is scheduled for 8:45 AM. Of course, it is a hospital and these things can change if the docs say so. I hope to be home by 2 PM.

In the meantime, I'm not supposed to have anything to eat or drink and I'm thirsty. So I can look forward to having a good glass of water after the surgery.

Attention To Details

Seems like I forgot to tell Nathan what hospital I'm getting the slice and dice done at. As I said to him on Saturday, Orem Community is a great place for having babies but if there's any chance of complications (like with a surgery...) then I'm going to Utah Valley.

And I also arranged for a friend to give me a ride to the hospital when Nathan was fully expecting to take me there. Not sure what I was thinking on that one. Maybe next time I should ask him first?

If I were to analyze it, I'd say that maybe if I don't treat the surgery like a big deal then I won't feel like it's a big deal? So then I don't have to be so anxious? Well, don't have to worry about that idea because I'm good and anxious. Can't wait for Tuesday afternoon so I can focus on recuperating.

For those who don't know but may want to know...

I'm tired and it's late, but I just realized that, apart from my coworkers, I've only told about five people this... Sometime Tuesday morning I'm having laparoscopic surgery for endometriosis. Apparently it's routine for the patient to not know until the night before what time the surgery is going to be. Lame. The surgical center is supposed to call me after 3 PM on Monday (tomorrow) to tell me when to show up.

In this case, the laparoscopy is a minor outpatient procedure that will both confirm the diagnosis of endometriosis and treat it if the doc finds that it's there. Endometriosis is where endometrium tissues that are usually in the uterus are found elsewhere in the abdomen. This causes pain. For me, the point of this surgery is to hopefully reduce the pain. How I understand it is that there'll be an incision near/in? my belly button and another about 4 inches down from that. One hole is used for the viewing instruments and the second is used for the cutting instruments. If the doctor sees endometriosis areas then he will cut or laser them off.

A coworker asked me last week if I was nervous. I told her then that I was trying not to think about it and it would be good to get it over with so that I could have less pain. Really though, I'm nervous. First off, I just plain don't like the idea of some stranger mucking around in my insides. Also, it's my first time going under general anesthesia, being intubated, and getting catheterized. Yuck, yuck, yuck. The surgical center called Friday to get a health history. I was asked if I have any caps or crowns on my teeth. Yeah, that's because if you have dental work on front teeth then sometimes they can get knocked off with the intubation process. Fun.

Here's the full story:
1. Last July I saw my general practice doctor because of some persistent abdominal pain. She sent me for an ultrasound and CT scan. When both tests came back normal, she referred me out to a gynecologist.

2. Due to not liking to try out new doctors, I procastinated and didn't get in to see an OB-GYN until November. The new doctor (well, nurse practicitioner really) listened to my history and immediately said it sounded like endometriosis. She gave a brief explanation of what it is and stated that the best treatment is surgery. Keep in mind that it took me 3 months to go to a specialist in the first place. My distaste at the idea must have shown on my face because when I asked if there were any alternatives she told me about a procedure called HSG that we could try first.

3. I went home and researched endometriosis and the HSG procedure (short for hysterosalpingogram). Turns out the only way to diagnose endometriosis is surgery and HSG just shows that it's not other things but it can't show that it IS endo. Which is probably what I would have heard from the nurse practitioner gyno if I had known what questions to ask and she had known how to say it so I understood.

4. I sucked it up and scheduled a pre-op appointment. That was March 18. I met with the doctor gyno who is doing the operation. I learned something - one doesn't have to be a surgeon to perform surgery. How reassuring. At least the doc seemed self-confident. Good. When he goes out to tell hubby that I'm a vegetable he'll be able to do so with poise.

False Alarm

Just kidding friends. Looks like I'm not moving into that place I excitedly posted about yesterday.

Turns out the previous tenants were a little misleading about the deposit and pet policy. Instead of a $250 deposit, it's really that much plus first and last month's rent except you have to pay last month's rent when the time comes, so it's really just $850 deposit. And $100 is non refundable for carpet cleaning, which the new tenant arranges for themselves. 1) that's an expensive carpet cleaning, and 2) why isn't this taken care of before the new person moves in?

Instead of a no cats or dogs policy, the landlord went on to say no snakes, birds, guinea pigs, or fish. More animals may have been mentioned. I'd rather not live there in fear that my pet rats will get me evicted. Holy cow, no fish?! Sounds a little uptight to me.

Oh yeah... Apparently the landlord (an elderly man) and his wife spend several months of every year in St George. What the heck? What if something needs to be taken care of?

I guess it's back to searching Craigslist ads. I'll let you know if things change.

Am I Really Doing This To Myself?

Well, Nathan and I have an appointment tomorrow to sign papers for a new apartment. Man I hate moving, but my now apartment is really bugging me and has been for a while. The new place is $600 a month and very close to my work. No more waiting for Nathan to pick me up! And I'm still being responsible with my money and not splurging for a much more expensive place that would leave us financially strapped each month. Which I've been tempted to do.


Cons about my curent place that I hope the new place will fix:
- have to drive over a curb every time I enter or leave the driveway because only about 3 feet of the entrance was smoothed down
- neighbors in the next house over who sit outside in their cars and blast mariachi music so loud that I feel the base while lying in my bed
- radiant heating located in the ceiling. And the heating system downstairs broke so there's a small space heater type thing stuck in the wall instead.
- nosy and noisy school  age children that constantly run by my window in good weather. And I live in the back of the building and these children are from several houses down.
- shower has separate knobs for hot and cold water. I spend half of my shower time adjusting the water temperature.

Possible cons about the new place:
- less storage space
- possibly not as much sunlight. Windows are only south and north facing. South facing windows have awning over them.
- only one story. Might feel like less space even though square footage is the same.

Pros about the new place:
- a block away from my work
- kitchen is L shaped and not galley style
- it's an end unit so there is only one shared wall. No neighbors above or below either.
- built in dishwasher

My New Pets

Several people have asked to see pictures of my new pets. The trick has been getting the picture taken fast enough. Turns out that rodents move quickly and my camera isn't as quick as I would like it to be.
Also, I can't figure out how to get the pics to post how I want them to. But here they are: Pearl (white and light gray) and Missy (dark gray with white belly). I'll post more later when I have time to struggle with my lame photo software.

It's A Small World

So. I was blog stalking this evening (my own personal phrase which today means that I was visiting friends' blogs and browsing their links to see if they had links to anybody that I knew too) when on a friend of a friend's site I found a blog that belongs to my cousin. Technically they're my second cousin and we've never met and they wouldn't know who I was unless I introduced myself and said, "Your mom's grandmother is my great-grandmother." But still. Pretty neat connectivity.That is definitely less than six degrees.

Hi Kris, I'm your cousin.

Forward #3

1. What is your occupation right now? Medical Assistant at a pediatrician's office
2. What color are your socks right now? Blue, Silver and White Stripes
3. What are you listening to right now? Pandora Radio
4. What was the last thing that you ate? Chocolate chip cookie dough (thanks Jessica)
5. Can you drive a stick shift? No. Have you seen me drive? Do you really want to divide my attention like that?
6. Last person you spoke to on the phone? My neighbor Jessica. She opened her cell phone to a screaming toddler and me asking "Has your daughter had Tylenol lately?"
7. What is your favorite sport to watch on TV? Not a big fan of being a spectator.
8. What is your favorite drink? Hot Chocolate
9. Have you ever dyed your hair? Nope
10. Favorite food? Italian! And no, this doesn’t work well with my doctor’s advice of following a low carb diet.
11. What is the last movie you watched? Robinson Family...that 17 month old little girl has a really good attention span when she chooses to.
12. How do you vent anger? To my husband mostly.
13. What was your favorite toy as a child? Books
14. What is your favorite season? Autumn and Spring. I love different things about each of them. The biggest one being that I'm not sweltering or freezing my patootie off. I hate being hot but I also hate having it be dark when I wake up and dark when I get home from work.
15. Cherries or Blueberries? That's an easy one because I don't like cherries.
16. Living arrangements? Okay, if you’re reading this then you should know the answer to that.
17. When was the last time you cried? Quite often since December 10. (you know, the whole dad thing)
18. What is on the floor of your closet? There’s a floor under all those cloths?
19. What did you do last night? Compared reviews for TV converter boxes. Told Nathan where to go to buy the one I decided on.
20. What are you most afraid of? Losing a loved one.
21. Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers? Cheeseburgers every time! Hold the onions.
22. Favorite dog breed? German Shepherds Are Awesome
23. How many states have you lived in? Only two. Again, if you're reading this then you probably know which two.
24. Diamonds or pearls? Pearls. Nathan’s a lucky man.
25. What is your favorite flower? Really not sure. I often agree with Meg Ryan when she said, "daisies are such happy flowers." Name that movie for a thousand...

Thoughts

Sayings such as "it takes a village to raise a child" and "no man is an island"... the continued popularity of Little House on the Prairie and Anne of Green Gables... reunion sites like MySpace and Facebook... seem to reinforce a theory of mine.

I believe there is a common need within humans to have a close knit network of loved ones. The traditional community where neighbors stopped by to visit and family went to grandmother's for holidays and you knew whose name to cuss out when  you found dog poo on your lawn. That community is becoming history and is being replaced by a society of superficiallness.

Text relationships where a scathing remark is ok because it was followed by LOL. Homes where fathers sit downstairs alone while adolescent children play internet games with people in other countries whom they've never met. Bored youth who rob the local electronics store for entertainment and never have to worry about facing the owner in the street the next day.

Hmmm, that sounds like I'm saying technology is the big bad wolf. It's not. It's the way that our culture is adapting to these inovations that I disaprove of. Not only are we being denied a moral compass, but we're missing a familiar face that recognizes without words that today was not a good day. We're missing the innate sense of knowing that someone out there does care. Artificial replacements have grown up. Activities like playgroup, book club, and 'neighborhood watch'.

Have you had a day lately where you never heard your name spoken out loud? A day where you didn't get hugged, or even feel the touch of another human being? A day where nobody smiled at you? Our souls know that we are loved, even when the words aren't said.